Are you supported?

Hi.

How you all doing? Better than Theresa May I bet. Don’t worry I’m not going all  political. What I want to blog about this week is support. Support from your family, from your friends and if your in business support of your customers or clients. A support network is very important.

One of the reasons Theresa May resigned is because she did not have the support of her cabinet. Without that support you are facing an uphill battle. When my clients come to me they want to change. I quickly establish why they want to change and who they want to change for. If it’s themselves then great, if it’s to please others then that is not so great. Trying to change to please others is not always a good idea and in the long term not always right for them. However is a client comes to me and wants to change for whatever reason, it could be weight loss or to stop smoking, or just to gain more confidence etc and they tell me it’s for them so that they can start to enjoy life more, then I will do all that I can to help that client, but on top of my help they need the support and the encouragement from those around them. Immediate family, friends and work colleagues. a few kind words of encouragement go a long way. and it means the world to the person who is trying to make that change.

I will be honest when I decided to leave my job and a steady wage to start my hypnotherapy business I lost some friends and family support, (not all but the ones who mattered) and without those it has felt lonely at times. However I have great self belief (Thanks to hypnotherapy) and I am making a success of the business, but it would still be so much sweeter with the full support of family and friends.

And now a commercial break

May Book

My book Can I Change. Available from Amazon. 

So what can you do to help and support someone who wants to or needs to change.  Well the first thing is show them support (even if you have doubts) give them words of encouragement boost their confidence, just be there. ListenYour very presence can be a comfort to a friend. Sometimes keeping someone company while they go through their trials is a gift in itself. Expand your friend’s perspective. If your friend seems to be afflicted with tunnel vision, help them expand their perspective. You could say, “There could be another way to look at this. What about…?” You could also expand perspective by pointing out the consequences of their actions to their future self: “This may seem like a good idea at this moment, but how will you feel in a week? A month? A year?” And you can shrink an overstated problem with a saying like, “This too shall pass.” If you dare, help them empathise with the other person in the conflict. Ask, “How can I help?” But be prepared to set boundaries if direct help would draw you too tightly into your friend’s knotty problem. What might work with one friend might not work with another. Use your good judgement. Ideally, your advice will strengthen your friend and give them more confidence in their own judgement in the future. And if you feel like you are getting in too deep, remember that ultimately it’s your friend’s job to solve their own problems, not you.

If your friend or family member is starting a new business, here are some ways that you could help them too.

Motivation and loneliness are among the top unforeseen challenges of starting a business. Staying motivated is critical to keeping a business alive, but it isn’t something you can buy. Family, friends, and colleagues can be a great source of motivation.  So even if you’ve never started a business, you can be instrumental in helping others start and maintain their own. Here’s what you can do to offer your support:

Take Them Out to Lunch

Starting a business can be lonely when you feel you are the only one that believes in your vision. That worsens when you have to work in isolation on initial business planning.

Invite your friend out to lunch or dinner for a ‘business meeting’. Let them talk to you about the challenges, goals, and recent successes in their business. Or, if they want a little break from the madness this could be a great opportunity to catch up and take a break from their business. Be open. Take their lead for the topic of conversation.

Ask How You Can Help

Funding is an important part of starting a business, but it’s not the only thing that matters. Marketing, sales, operations, and accounting are also critical parts to a successful business. Ask what is need and how you might be of help. This is could be a great opportunity for you to sharpen some skills that you are not using in your own day-to-day job. Ask, you might be surprised with what they say.

Share Resources

Networking is powerful. If you hear of networking events, find a professional organisation, or just meet someone that you think would be a great resource – be sure to share that info with your friend. You can make an introduction via LinkedIn or emails, or just text over a link.

Have Impactful Interactions

In an industry where you have to constantly prove your business value and trajectory, it’s important to stay encouraged.  Encourage your friend by reminding them of their potential and initial vision. Remember those ‘small victories’ or ‘resources’ that might help them push through hard times. Like their posts. Make comments on their facebook or Instagram pages. Promote their website.

As Mr Tesco once said Every little helps.

Until next time. Have a great week

Jon XX

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