They didn’t teach us this!

So I trained to become a hypnotherapist. I worked really hard, I learnt loads. The history and thinking behind my new skill. Lots of different techniques and I worked with case studies to perfect my art. I qualified, my door was open now bring on the clients. Hello I said bring on the clients.

Oh hang on, we have to find our own clients. They didn’t tell us that bit. How many therapists feel like this? Not just therapists, but anyone that offers a service and aim to get business across social media.

Now, I am one of the lucky ones because having an IT background I understand about algorithms and how they work ( well a lot of the time I do). However so many therapists don’t have an IT knowledge. Where does that leave them?

We ask friends and family to like and share our page, which they do, but is there really any prospect of them becoming a paying client? The answer is no not really. They are showing their support but that isn’t going to pay the bills. So now what? Well you have to start posting regularly on your chosen platforms, but what do you post? how do you get likes? Will they share my post? Do I need to pay for likes? HELP!

I need help.

Help is around, but what I have found that there are a lot of marketeers trying to sell you the same package that they sell to a plumber, a car salesman, a painter and decorator. what do they really know about the therapy business? As therapists we face problems over and above other services.

  • People are scared to like posts as it shows their name and their friends may notice.
  • Therapy of any sort still has a stigma attached to it so people don’t tend to share.
  • What we do is all a bit Woo Woo. According to some. We know it isn’t, we know it works. but how do we prove that if we can’t attract clients?
  • The chances of your post getting in front of a client at exactly the right moment is very very slim.
  • People don’t like admitting they have a problem so are reluctant to ask for help.
  • The list goes on.

So what can we do. Ahh. Well that’s where I can help. You see I’ve only been full time just over 3 years now but in that time I have been lucky enough to stay busy and have a constant flow of clients. I have been able to do this as I understand how to get the best out of Facebook, Instagram and social media in general, and the best thing is that I did it on a zero budget.

So what I have done is compiled a 50+ page manual aimed at therapists, but will help anyone that offers a service to raise their awareness on social media, and in doing so will get your name out there and keep it out there until your client is ready, and when they are ready they contact you and become a new paying client.

Perhaps you may find that missing piece.

I will be selling this manual for just £49.00 but it is filled with tips and advice on how to post, what to post, when to post and about creating an identity on social media. I let you know the costly mistakes that I made, so that you don’t make them and I also point you in the direction of some excellent free software or apps that are my go to when posting.

What Can Social Media Do For You?

A helpful manual for therapists and small business to create a better presences on social media. SEPTEMBER SPECIAL OFFER JUST £49.00

£49.00

You do not need a PayPal account to pay via Paypal.

I’m not going to promise you a major influx of clients or that you will be earning £50k plus by Christmas but as long as you make some of the suggested tweaks, and make it your own, you will see a rise in your social media presence.

If you are reading this and want to know more please feel free to email me at jadkin.bahyp@gmail.com or see my Facebook page I’m doing this to help and support therapists and small businesses that have just survived a very tough time. As I say I’m not a marketeer, I’m just someone who understands what you are going through.

I want to turn on that light at the end of the tunnel for you.

Until next week, or possibly the week after 🙂

Have a great week or two.

Take care and stay safe.

Jon X

Hypnotherapy in Suffolk, Essex and Cambridge. and online via Zoom

Jon Adkin Author of ‘Can I Change?’ Available from Amazon. and 100 days in isolation. A collection of funny original images of one mans decent into comic madness during lockdown

Find me on You TubeFacebook and Instagram.

Just checking in

Hi. A different type of blog today. I’ve noticed that the lock down is starting to take it’s toll on some people. So today I want to offer you a weekly mental health check in.

Feelings.

Set an alarm on your phone, or a reminder in your calendar, so at a set time each week you can quickly do a check in on a scale from 0(‘not at all’) to 10 (‘extremely’) of how stressed, anxious or down you are feeling.

Body

Take a moment to notice any tension in your body like tight shoulders, chest or jaws. Other signs that you might be feeling stressed include dryness of the mouth, difficulty breathing, and a racing heart.

Sleep

If you are constantly struggling to get to sleep, waking in the night,waking earlier than usual and/or finding it difficult to get back to sleep, these are signs your mind is unable to switch off and relax.

Thoughts

Are you worrying about the worst-case scenarios? Focusing on the ‘what-if’ scenarios is not useful and is best to try to limit this as much as possibe.

Reactions and behaviour

If you find yourself frequently snapping at those you love, finding it extremely difficult to focus, or always depending on things like alcohol or food to cope. It is time to prioritise your mental wellbeing.

Check in buddy

Choose a check in buddy. This may be your partner, housemate or even a friend or colleague you’re keeping in touch with via social media or face time etc. Be honest with yourself and with them about how you are coping.

I sadly can’t see you one to one at the moment but I am offering Online sessions if you need that little bit of extra help.

Be kind to others.

How we can cope with lock down.

We are social animals, So how will we stop getting lonely and crazy as we distance ourselves socially and self-isolate? Well, our first motto should be: “Don’t waste a crisis!” If we are imaginative, we will find silver linings in these very dark clouds. We can experiment with new ways of living. These won’t just help us cope with the emergency. they actually can help us to enjoy it.

Virtual coffees, lunches and dinners

Using face time or What’s app create a group and have a coffee morning. Have a good old chat, moan and more importantly a laugh.

Sing and dance

The Italians are keeping their spirits up by singing from their balconies. But they don’t have a monopoly on bel canto. or how about remote dancing. Friends in Italy are already using an app called House Party to have virtual parties. let’s use the technology for good.

On yer bike

Public transport isn’t safe. So for short distances, why not walk? And for middling distances,as part of your daily exercise, why not bike? It’s also a good way to keep fit.

Virtual gyms

So many personal trainers are offering work outs for all ages and all fitness levels. Find one that suits you and make it a routine.

Enjoy some happy memories

Time to reflect

Most people’s lives are dictated by routines: take the kids to school, rush to work, endless emails, get home, crash. The rat race isn’t great. But sitting around home twiddling our thumbs won’t be much fun either. So we need new routines.

Every morning, I have started to say out loud 5 things I am grateful for. Every evening I do the same and think why they are meaningful. These habits provide bookends to my day and help me make the most of what happens in between. I’ve also used my music streaming service and I’m listening to all the albums that made a mark on my life. (boy, some of them are crap when you re-listen), but that is what makes it a great thing to do.

Deepen our friendships

Much of the time, we’re too busy to think deeply about our friends and family. But now we’ll have more time. We can use some of it to think about what our loved ones really need and then help them get it… remotely. this time also shows who the true friends are. The ones who check in on you, the ones who make you smile. The ones who care.

Enjoy a good book

Virtual book groups

People will also have time to read. But that can be a lonely activity – and we get more intellectual stimulation if we share our ideas with others. How about when you finish a book, type out your thoughts and send them to friends to provoke discussion. Why not go further and organise virtual book groups?

Connect with far-away friends

Just because you’re not in the same room doesn’t mean you can’t have a deep friendship. Indeed, the virus offers an opportunity to connect with those who live far away. After all, if you are distancing yourself physically from others, it doesn’t matter whether they are in London, Cayman or Milan. The more we reach across the world and show we care for one another, the more we’ll help defeat that other terrible virus: nationalism.

Other people will have different ideas about how to make the most of this virus crisis. We can all experience the pleasure of inventing and experimenting with new ways of living.

Until next week. Stay safe, stay healthy.

Best wishes

Jon X

Hypnotherapy in Suffolk, Essex and Cambridge.

Jon Adkin Author of ‘Can I Change?’ Available from Amazon.

Find me on You TubeFacebook and Instagram.

Isolation and our Mental Health.

As coronavirus continues to spread in the UK the government has implemented a lockdown on the country meaning all non-essential travel to be avoided.

The new measures have also seen pubs, restaurants and theatres close, while people have been asked to work from home where possible. A long period of isolation may well be a necessary measure for public health but it has been acknowledged that it could also have a detrimental impact on people’s mental health.


So what should you do if your mental health is suffering during self-isolation; are there ways to ensure you safeguard your emotional and mental wellbeing during a potentially extended period of being alone?

One of the main problems with self-isolation is that we start to miss “micro-lifts” that we normally have peppered throughout our day without even necessarily realising. “You’re on your way to work, you might pop into your favourite coffee shop or say hi to someone in the street, there are small little things throughout our day that help to lift us often without us even realising. When you’re alone at home that doesn’t happen – and the cumulative effect of that is massive, especially around the two-week mark. So instead we need to create micro-lifts, it has to be something that generates a sense of achievement. That might be a new exercise, learning a little bit of a language, talking to someone on FaceTime or joining a book group online.

Healthy Body, Health Mind

Do keep a healthy diet

When you’re at home it can be tempting to just sit on the sofa without moving, eating unbalanced meals and snacking all day as a way to entertain yourself.
Do your best to eat well. If you haven’t got people who can bring food to you then see if you can sign up to home deliveries from your local supermarket. Have a look to see if there are any community support groups in your local area that can provide support with shopping.
you should try to get exposure to the outside world and exercise as much as possible within the limits. Our physical health and mental health are linked so try to create a routine that includes some physical exercise,
Although you can’t spend time with others, do make the most of any private outdoor space you have – such as a garden or balcony – if you have one, as being in nature can also help our wellbeing.
Also says try looking out of the window to watch the birds or tend to houseplants to keep your mind stimulated and engaged with nature. If you can, also open the window and let fresh air into your room.
I bought some bird feeders ages ago and now I’ve realised that a tiny Robin visits my garden everyday almost at the same time.

Do maintain a sense of routine

Find yourself spending all day in your pyjamas or remembering at 3pm that you haven’t brushed your teeth because you knew you wouldn’t be seeing anyone? Although in the short term it can feel nice to be lazy, in the long term this isn’t going to be good for your mental wellbeing.
As far as possible, try to maintain as much of a routine as you can. Wake up and go to bed at healthy times to ensure you get enough sleep.
Although you want to maintain a routine, don’t just fall into a cycle of sleeping, working, eating, and repeating: “Find some time to still have value to your day, life cannot be just eating and sleeping. Do something fun for yourself (that isn’t just Netflix).
I’ve got my paint brushes out and not only finished three paintings that I started months and months ago. It started the artistic juices flowing so I now have 3 new pieces on the go. Watch this space https://jonadkin.com/my-art/ for the unveilings.

One of my Acrylics.

I’m still talking to clients and I’m hearing a lot of people who are self isolating are losing their optimism for the future, they are using time for self reflecting and picking apart everything that is wrong with their life: their job, their relationship, their friendships. When we’re overwhelmed by a mundane life, it can quickly draw out the joy, so make fun for yourself.
Don’t just sit in front of a screen – vary your activities.
Sitting in front of a screen all day – whether for work or pleasure – is not the best way to spend long periods of time. Especially because the blue light from devices, like smartphones, can be disruptive to your sleep and overall wellbeing.

Do stay connected to people

Just because you’re self-isolating, doesn’t mean you have to cut yourself off altogether, If you feel that you’re beginning to struggle, take some time to call a friend or family member. Talk about how you’re feeling. If you don’t have anyone you can speak to you can call emotional support lines like the Samaritans.
I also recommend maintaining your social network during self-isolation: “Even when isolated, try as much as possible to keep your personal daily routines or create new routines. If health authorities have recommended limiting your physical social contact to contain the outbreak, you can stay connected via email, social media, video conference and telephone.


Limit your news intake

If you are finding the constant 24/7 coverage of coronavirus is impacting your mental health, particularly on social media, then you can opt out. A near-constant stream of news reports about an outbreak can cause anyone to feel anxious or distressed.
Seek information updates and practical guidance at specific times during the day from health professionals and the WHO website and avoid listening to or following rumours that make you feel uncomfortable.

Don’t believe all that you read.

Don’t get drawn into a negative spiral

One of the most dangerous things for your mental health is having too much time to think about your life critically. When self-isolating you’ve got a lot of time to think and it’s very common to experience massive life dissatisfaction as a result. You can start off the process feeling calm and not germophobic but gradually you start to morph into this. You get into a constant flow of critiquing your life and yourself, and you really need to avoid those negative cognitive spirals.”
You will survive this, we will all survive this and come out better people. Just don’t suffer alone. There are people you can turn to for help. Don’t be scared. Be strong.
Until Next week.
Be safe. Be Healthy

Jon X

Hypnotherapy in Suffolk, Essex and Cambridge.

Jon Adkin Author of ‘Can I Change?’ Available from Amazon.

Find me on You TubeFacebook and Instagram.

Don’t let your thoughts ruin your Christmas.

Hi. Welcome back to my last post of 2019. What a year it’s been. Ups and downs and a few surprises thrown in. However with all that I survived mine and you survived yours if you are reading this. so well done. The good bits hold in your heart the bad bits let them go. if you made mistakes, learn from them. if they weren’t your problem then don’t worry about it and just move on.

For my last blog I want to conclude my posts on  self confidence.

I am a great believer in positive thinking and self belief and daily affirmations have helped me so much. Remember what we say to ourselves we believe, our mind believes so think positive and you will stay positive.

Here are some quotes and affirmations that I would like to share with you for Christmas.

Self-Confidence Quotes

One important key to success is self-confidence. An important key to self-confidence is preparation.

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Nothing builds self-esteem and self-confidence like accomplishment.

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Don’t let others put thoughts into your mind that takes away your self-confidence.
To excel at the highest level – or any level,

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you need to believe in yourself,

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Always be yourself and have faith in yourself.

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Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.

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Just believe in yourself. Even if you don’t, pretend that you do and, at some point, you will.

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Confidence comes not from always being right but from not fearing to be wrong.

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Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will.

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As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live.

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Confidence is when you believe in yourself and your abilities, arrogance is when you think you are better than others and act accordingly.

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The most beautiful thing you can wear is confidence .

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Why should we worry about what others think of us, do we have more confidence in their opinions than we do our own?

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To establish true self-esteem we must concentrate on our successes and forget about the failures and the negatives in our lives.

Daily Affirmations

I believe in me.

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I’m getting stronger every day.

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I can do this.

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I am who I want to be

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I know my worth

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I’ve decided I’m good enough.

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I have the strength to change my story.

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I deserve to be happy and loved.

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I accept myself unconditionally.

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I love myself, and I accept myself as I am.

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I am confident.

When you get up in the morning choose an affirmation and smile at yourself in the mirror and say it to yourself. It’s a simple and powerful way to start your day.

Merry Christmas and I sincerely wish you all the very best for 2020.

See you in January. Have a good one.

Jon XX

These last few posts have been taken from my book ‘Can I Change?‘ Available from Amazon .It makes an ideal stocking filler.

 

Confidence. A Christmas gift for you.

Hi

Welcome back. This week I want to share some tips that will help you gain some of that confidence that you may feel you need.

Habits That Make You Feel Positive and Confident

Make a decision. Don’t consult with a friend about what to order at  dinner or call your spouse when shopping for groceries. Make a decision based on what your gut is telling you. It will make you feel stronger and allows you to practice trusting your inner voice.

Try something new. Confidence doesn’t come from perfection, it comes from effort.

Gently exercise. Exercise is the most important non-medicine           treatment for anxiety, depression, and insomnia. Just moving your body will break up negative thoughts and boost serotonin. Move your body every day, just be mindful of your energy and never overdo it. A seven minute workout or yoga in your living room will all work.

Clean up your news feed. Social media that is full of triggers, images, and updates can push you into a bad mood. Start following inspirational or “happy” accounts. HealthyPlace on Facebook or my Guidance Girl page always inspires. The more positive images you view the better you will feel.

Think back. Think back over the past week and write down every nice thing others said to you. Review the complements or comments when you’re feeling insecure.

Make a happy playlist. Music can  physiologically changes your brain and body. It can make you breathe faster, increase your pulse, and make you smile. Songs with a quick tempo and uplifting lyrics have been shown to be more effective at bringing out happy emotions. One of my favourites is ‘Happy’ by Pharrell. What are a few on your playlist?

Say no. Don’t say yes when you want to say no. You’re letting yourself down if you do favours you don’t want to do. Next time someone asks for something that will make you feel funky, and you feel the urge to say “yes,” remind yourself they are asking, not ordering. You will respect yourself more later on.

Practice posture. Hunching over at your desk can make you less        confident and more insecure according to research from Ohio State   University. Pull your belly button in towards your spine and pull your shoulders back when sitting or standing.

Give yourself credit for small, daily accomplishments, even if you are not done. Did you work on cleaning up your closet but still have stacks of clothes to fold? Great, take a moment to focus on what you have done, don’t just wait until a project is finished.

Get grateful. Write a thank-you note, or call someone to say thanks for meeting with you for lunch last week. People who are mindful of the positives in their life, create more positive energy. Comment on a post you like, email a friend, or even write down what you are grateful for in the moment (try and think of 5 new ones each time).

Remember, small shifts can produce remarkable results. The intention of building more positive thoughts and experiences will undoubtedly increase your self-confidence and self-esteem. One of my favourite  affirmations that may help is:

 

“I am perfectly imperfect.

I strive for better while loving all that I am today.

In loving myself today, I am better equipped to

improve myself tomorrow.”

Change2

Can I do it?

Self-Efficacy “You Can Do It – You’ve Got What It Takes, or Can Get What It Takes!”

Self-efficacy is where we believe that it is possible for us to acquire the knowledge and skills that will enable us to achieve goals and success. It enables us to accept difficult challenges, and persist in the face of        setbacks and adversity. The opposite of self-efficacy is feelings like, you are not bright enough, or you are not educated enough, you didn’t go to the right school or university, or you are lacking anything, that you use as an excuse to justify your belief, that you can’t do it, you’ve not got what it takes, and you can’t get what it takes.

Self-Esteem “You Matter as Much as Anyone Else, You Deserve it, and You Can Cope with Anything!”

Self-esteem, is the belief that we matter, that we are important, in fact as important as anyone else, and that in general terms, we can cope with pretty much whatever life throws at us, and that we have a right to be happy and successful. Our self-esteem is helped, if others around us, approve of us and what we do; but it also helped, if we feel we are     behaving virtuously, and also that we are competent and skilled at what we do, and that we have the ability to accomplish things we want to, when we put our minds to it.

Positive Self-Image “You are Good Enough in All Respects Just as You Are!”

Dr Maxwell Maltz, wrote a book called Psycho-Cybernetics, which has helped millions of people. Dr Maltz was a plastic surgeon, who regularly positively impacted people’s physical appearance with his plastic        surgery. He observed the difference between people who had a positive perception of their physical changes, and how that positive perception could massively improve their success and happiness in life, and those who had a negative or unchanging perception of their appearance. In the case of the latter, nothing changed in their life. Our self-image, can have a massive impact on our self-confidence, and on the outcomes we achieve in our careers and lives.

14 Ways To Shed Negativity And Achieve Happiness

How many of us feel complete self-love and self-compassion? How many of us take care of our own needs and rely on the way we look at         ourselves instead of seeing who we are through the eyes of our partners or our tribe? How many of us live from our core beliefs instead of living through what everyone is expecting of us?

Learning self-love and overcoming the barriers you’ve built against   yourself are the greatest secrets to living happily. Self-love can bring you closer to inner truth and allow you to attract and create the happiness you deserve in your relationship, career, and life. Self-love will bring peace, love, fulfilment, satisfaction, significance, groundedness,         freedom, maturity, wisdom, and magic into your life.

Change

Here are 14 self-love steps that you can begin today to attract the love and happiness you want in your life:

 

  1. Get to know who you are.

Imagine yourself walking down the street with each one of your values. How do you feel? What do you notice? How are you expressing yourself? This will help you identify yourself through your own eyes instead of through the eyes of others.

  1. Be true to yourself. 

You can only speak your truth and express who you are when you are 100% honest with yourself first. Sometimes we discover things we don’t necessarily like about ourselves, but you can spend your life complaining about your weaknesses, or you can choose to shift your attention to your strengths.

  1. Take care of your needs.

We often do what others need so we can feel good about ourselves through the way they react to our action. This causes us to live our lives through the eyes of others and not from our core. Instead, take a look at what your needs are. What is the ONE thing you can do today that would make you feel more loved? For example, you can cook for      yourself, take a hot bubble bath, meditate, clean your room, or go wild listening to your favourite band.

  1. Learn to breathe.

We have a tendency to pressure ourselves into doing things quickly. Step back a little bit and watch yourself in action. What is the worst thing that could happen if you don’t get your tasks done immediately? Would you rather stay overwhelmed or would you rather enjoy your journey as you are completing your tasks?

  1. Be patient with yourself.

Have self-compassion. Your role models probably worked their butt off to get to where they are now, so be patient, take your journey step-by-step, and enjoy how life is unfolding for you. You miss out on so much in life when you beat yourself up. Patience is key to discovering the beauty of the mystery that every moment brings to you.

  1. Listen to your inner child.

The inner child is a very powerful voice that resides deep in our being. It is the voice of the needs that have not been met ever since we were kids. It talks to us about fear, hurt, and the safety that it is longing for and the love that it hungers for. So when you are in a challenging situation, step back for a moment and ask your inner child, “What is really hurting me right now? What do I really want?”

  1. Count your blessings.

We all have SO many blessings in our lives that we tend to take them for granted. Count every single thing you have in your life and be thankful for it. It could be as simple as being grateful for drinking water whenever you want. Practicing gratitude helps us find more meaning and appreciation in our everyday life.

  1. Accept your feelings.

Pain is part of life, and accepting what you feel right now is the first step towards your happiness. You may be angry and in so much pain, you might be regretting what you have done in the past. Allowing yourself to feel helps you identify the root cause of your disappointment and the moment you understand this feeling, you shift towards discovering what you want in life and how to get it.

  1. Do one act of kindness everyday.

Say something nice to a colleague or family member and show appreciation to people around you. This is a great way to start acknowledging the goodness in yourself and reflecting it in others.

  1. Build your support system.

You don’t have to hang out with people who don’t make you feel good about yourself. You have a choice, so find people who think like you, who are positive, who show support, who are grateful, and who reflect the quality that you want to have in your life.

  1. Work with your fears.

We all have fears that have been engraved within us ever since our childhood. Understanding your fears and allowing them to surface will help you work through them. When you repress and reject your fears because of unrealistic expectations of being perfect that society imposes on us, you will be granting more power and control to your fears.

  1. Recognize the love that is within you.

You are made of of love, you are love, and love rules Earth. No matter how much you try to beat yourself up or indirectly hurt others, know that in your heart you are seeking love in every moment you live. The only guarantee you have in life is that you can give love without expecting anything in return. Be the love that you want to experience in your life and in your relationship.

  1. Forgive and let go of the past.

Beating yourself up and blaming your unhappiness on the past will trigger more suffering in your life. You know you have a purpose in your life, so you have a choice: let the past haunt you and inflict more suffering in your life, or forgive yourself.

  1. Smile.

Smiling is healing for the heart, the mind and the body. Certain experiences can bring a smile to our face, and sometimes a smile can truly shift a negative emotion to a positive one. It is a simple way to heal yourself and bring a smile to other people’s faces.

You can stop and overcome the barriers that are preventing you from getting what you want. You are strong and you are love in your own   nature, so how are you going to use these strengths to create the happy life and loving relationship you want?

Next week I will share some Affirmations and some powerful quotes that have certainly helped me over the years.

Have a great week

Jon X

Want to read more or keep tips like this to hand. Buy my book ‘Can I change‘ From Amazon.